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Calming the Critical Voice in Your Head | Scott Gazzoli - Episode 39

This week's Quest for New Inspiration is answered by Scott Gazzoli of the Causing the Effect Podcast. This episode might be a bit different than my previous episodes, but it might also be my favorite interview ever. Scott and I chatted about a wide variety of crazy and inspiring topics.

Scott Gazzoli is the host of Causing The Effect. Scott has always had the urge to help others and believes his podcast can transform people’s perspectives and limits. Scott lives, works and podcasts from Brooklyn, New York and is available for speaking engagements.

Scott is a Managing Director with the Quest Organization, a boutique advisory firm that caters to the needs of High Net Worth Individuals and Families. Scott prides himself on his ability to create solutions and build relationships with his clients. Scott is also a comedian by night!

Sometimes we find ourselves living by other people’s expectations and perceptions. Being our true self is one of the biggest gifts we can give ourselves. This can be one of the most rewarding things we accomplish in life. Causing The Effect is a podcast focused on the true exploration of your mind and body to become your true self. The goal is to share and serve valuable knowledge that will bring your life to a new awareness through modern psychology, practical wisdom and physiology. Scott has a variety of guests he interviews from scientists to psychologists and fitness enthusiasts. Causing The Effect is a true mind and body podcast.

Guest Links:

Transcript: ( Autogenerated)

[00:00:00] Hello. Hello and welcome to another episode of the quest for new inspiration. My name is Katie Maschler and this week I am super excited to share with you my episode with Scott Gozali. Lily of the causing the effect podcast. Now this episode comes with a bit of a vocabulary warning. if you know me personally, you know, I don't have a problem with this, but just in general. and it's a bit different than my previous episodes. But it might also be my favorite interview ever.

Scott and I chatted about a wide variety of crazy and inspiring topics from the mob to working with Jay Z to other inspiring advice. I hope he inspires you as much as he inspired me.

Scott G: Well, if you want to know you want a good nugget, [00:01:00] I'll tell you, I'll tell you a good story quickly. Uh, my father lives in, I've been to Kansas. Well, I don't know. I've been to Kansas.

You're you said you're Missouri. So my father lives in Shawnee, Kansas. Okay. So I've been there. Quite a few times, make a story very quickly. My father, grew up with me till I was six. I thought he was in the coffee business. He was not in the coffee business. He was selling another thing that gets you jacked up, starts with sea cocaine.

He went to the witness protection program. He had to go move to showing Kansas. He changed his name. So this motherfucker used to be named Scott Oli. He changed his name. and now I'm stuck here with the same name. I gotta watch my back. No, that was many years ago. It was like 25 years ago. And to round out the whole craziness of the story, cuz this will pull in with your grandfather.

Um, my grandfather died last month as well. And he told me the full story of what happened. He got out of jail two years ago. My father is the one who put him in jail. So my father ratted on my grandfather, snitched on him, put him in jail and my father ran [00:02:00] away and did the whole thing. That is a good starter.

That's a good story to get to know me. Huh?

KT Maschler: Oh, my gosh. Wow. Um, have you ever thought about starting your, your own true crime podcast

Scott G: based on your favorite? Well, I gotta do the, I gotta do the whole movie. So here you wanna give me get weirder? My, I was like, not in the, I'm not in anything when I was a kid.

You know, they would like, my father went away. So the real, my uncles were like real mafia, Gambino, crime, family, all this cool stuff. And, um, they would like keep me around the Pinacle club and I would like, you know, do, uh, handout drinks to start. And you would be like a kid and you would get like $20 every time you got a couple drinks.

So I would come home with like, Hundreds of dollars then they said, would you mind bringing an envelope around the block? And I had no problem doing that. And then you start getting higher and higher, and then they said, well, you gotta light a car on fire. Okay. I may let one or two cars on fire, and then it get it, get a little wor and then when it gets to, like, you gotta break somebody's legs, you have to do, I stopped doing that then, like, I felt a little [00:03:00] uncomfortable, so that was like me a 13.

I had my mother got me out of it. Now my sister is a cop. So she's that fucking rap bass on the other side of the thing. so it's very funny how the, um, the whole thing walks around, but like my whole life, I never knew what happened to my dad. And now I got the whole story from my grandfather. Thank God. He told me before he passed, because that was like a big piece that was missing.

From me as a kid, cuz it's like, holy shit. Like, you know what happened to my dad? Am I not good? Usually have all those things as a kid. Like, am I good enough? Where's my dad, blah, blah, blah, blah. So I'm glad. Uh, so that's a good story for you. And now to answer your question, I'm gonna have a movie, obviously Ryan Goling is gonna play me.

It's gonna be beautiful, but I gotta do something really big to like finish it off. So right now this we're like, that's like 40 minute that's in the movie and now we have like another two hours of it to like do some crazy stuff in my life. So.

KT Maschler: I love it so much. You gotta do like an introductory, like whole shining there's 20 minutes.

Scott G: oh, me as a kid. I figured. Yeah. Yeah. I'll have like a six year old version of Scott. Then we have a 12 year old version doing like the end of that. And then we have a. [00:04:00] This version of Scott, which is, uh, it's getting better now. I'm at like Scott version, like 7.6. So it is, um, it's been fun kind of leveling up and finding inspiration, right.

Kind of goes through your podcast. So it's, uh, it's fun. What made you wanna start this?

Definitely my grandpa, for sure. Losing him. He was kinda my biggest inspiration in general, but I kind of search for inspiration elsewhere. And at that same time,

And at the same time, my boss wanted to start a podcast of their own. And I realized I loved it so much that I wanted like my own creative dump. So it kind of turned into the quest for new inspiration.

Scott G: Yes. And it's funny enough, the name of my, so break, break it down for everybody. I run an advisory firm here in Manhattan, catering to celebrities, ultra high networth families.

I got very lucky making money, financial services, all that. And then the name in my company. It's quest, that's the [00:05:00] name of the company quest organization. So see, it's all, it's all coming together. So I do that. The podcast I'm like you, like, this is my passion. I'll do this Monday, Tuesday, Fridays. Don't tell my team that cuz these kids are, these kids are working their ass off right now.

Um, and then at night I do stand up comedy. it's crazy. My life is a little is a little wild. Um, it's it's exciting. I kind of got inspired after I got divorced in uh, 2019. I did like everything. My mother said, get a good job, meet a nice girl, buy the house. And I did it all and I'm still miserable.

I'm like, this doesn't seem right. And I think that, that's why I started my podcast to like really help, people like think for themselves almost. So I feel like you just do what your parents say for a little bit. And if you, if like your parents could help you chew a certain extent, um, but they can't really help.

You kind of make the path of like what your purpose and like who you're supposed to be and all that jazz.

KT Maschler: Yes. Okay. Well, you kind of like unraveled my first question and answered it all by yourself. I love it. so it, you run this agency, you also do the podcast, all of the above. [00:06:00] You kind of mentioned what led up to where you are right now, as you said, Scott,

Scott G: that 7.3 version 7.3

KT Maschler: 0.3 high level.

Okay. but what kind of got you exactly to where you are, you know, what kind of shifted that. Man mindset from, you know, mentality to

Scott G: yeah. There's been like a ton of different versions and I kind like that part of this it's like, there's, there's like Scott in like different phases. So that 13 year old Scott, you would've saw that, went to a high school to play football.

That's really all I wanted to do. I was a big football player back in the day. I was like 260 pounds. So lot thicker, a lot bigger. Um, I blew my knee out. Uh, so I got signed, uh, to central Florida to go play football when I was 18. Ended up blowing my knee out a couple games before I was supposed to, you know, before high school was over.

So that kind of diminished that dream. and I could have, you know, kind of recovered from it. I just, I had the tendency in my twenties or even in my teens at that point to like, I always quit when things got hard. And after my divorce, I said, I'm going to pick two things that I really feel passionate about.

And I people don't, you have to really [00:07:00] look at the values behind of the things you're doing. So for me, I never realized, like, I love people. I love growing and I love connection. Obviously with podcasting and comedy, you have that, um, in spades. So I made a promise to myself when I turned 30, that was two years ago that I would, not only go after my biggest fear of, I had like debilitating stage fright, so I'd get nervous before podcast.

I would like. Can't talk in front of people. Now, two years later, it's like, what the fuck was wrong with me? I have 200 shows under my belt doing comedy. I have 200 episodes on the podcast. This shit is easy. It's fun. I'm built for it. Um, and I think there's something to that. Like, whatever, a person like wherever, like your weaknesses.

Whatever your fear is, you have to like attack that like dead on. And like, everything else becomes really, really easy. So, um, I was married. I built a house in Brooklyn, the, you know, all that great stuff and it just wasn't working. Nothing really bad happened. She was a great girl, just different phases. I would say I'm more, more of a growth mindset.

Person, like I wanna keep growing. I wanna keep learning. I'm a little weird. I do all these different things. And my ex-wife was more like a classic [00:08:00] old school woman from the 1940s. Why, why are you trying to work out so much? Why are you not home? Why can't we just watch the news, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

so I said, I'm gonna make a change. Um, and I've really D done that. So, um, Discipline, I would say is a big piece of what I do. I'm up four, 4:00 AM. Every morning I do about an hour, hour and a half of mental work. I call it that's more like the mind. then I move to the body, go to the gym for two hours.

Um, so I really believe in kind of that incorporation of the mind, body and spirit. And that's like what? My podcast is more about, like causing the effect is supposed to be like, don't wait. To feel a certain way or don't, you know, I think people believe like I'm gonna have this belief in myself that I'm gonna start doing stuff.

It's actually the opposite. You have to start doing things, start moving around to get that belief in yourself. It's sort of like fake it to you, make it. But, um, that's what I do with comedy ass. We do with podcasting. Um, the podcast is boom and I love it. It's really, I thought it would've been like more older people like spirituality and wisdom, but it's really like a young kid.

Kind the kids love it. 18 to 25 is my demographic. And a lot of kids from New York are like, they're like, Scott, I feel like you're telling me things. I, I kind of [00:09:00] already know. And that's really all. I look at myself as like, I'm very curious. I'm like a vessel taking a lot of knowledge. We have psychologists on neuroscientists, uh, a lot of different people from just like very, very different kind of backgrounds, but things that are very useful and like practical knowledge almost.

just trying to like. Not having a father growing up. I feel like it was so difficult for me to like figure stuff out. I made every mistake in the book, a lot of gambling, a lot of drinking, a lot of boozing, a lot of sex, a lot of women, a lot of drugs, a lot of rock and roll, all that stuff. And that, that was not the answer for me.

And, um, I'm, I'm happy that I was able to like get through all that stuff in my thirties. Um, cuz you don't realize. You know, until some people don't realize until, until it's later. Like money's not the answer. It's not about that. It's about kind of understanding where your purpose is and, um, you know, focusing on that and having a name and being able to like hit, hit that goal.

KT Maschler: Well, let's unpack all that because that

Scott G: downloaded that eight minutes later.

Alright, well, imposter syndrome. I definitely can relate to that. you know, fake it until you make it. I [00:10:00] just was on a that's what she said by Kimberly Love on Legere new. TV talking about dealing with imposter syndrome.

Like, I feel like I'm a podcaster. I believe I'm a podcaster. I. Bright and produce a podcast. But I don't really believe in myself as a podcaster. So me doing the podcast, it kind of pushes that, you know, every single day it kind of tests and challenged me. So I love working on it. I love talking to new people and I love like the networking and the steps that I've made and evolved and grown through it. .

Scott G: It.

Mean, I think you're always gonna have a little bit of imposter syndrome until you think you hit somewhere. You're gonna be, and I think. There's a difference between having like a goal and setting it and then getting obsessed with your goals. Like, for me, the first year of the podcast, like I'm a classic Brooklyn kid.

Like I just wanna hit my goals and keep moving. You gotta keep growing, keep growing. It's like, you don't wanna get caught up. And I actually realize this when I was in Maui, I was, and every night, like, you know, the stars are absolutely [00:11:00] imaculate the darker, it gets, the more bright it gets. And I'm sitting there trying to understand my purpose and I feel like people, I, I get that question a lot from people.

How do I figure out my purpose? And it's like, I'm still trying to figure that out myself. And, and I kind of came to that realization. Like the purpose is not the, the hitting the numbers or becoming a podcast or like the purpose. Is life itself. Like it's this conversation in this moment, me and Katie hanging out, having a good time, making sure like the quality of where I am in my mind, I'm here with you.

And that's all I've been focusing on, um, is like the quality of my consciousness. Understanding like I'm in every moment I'm, I'm in the moment, but every conversation I have, everything I do. If it's clean in my room, I'm gonna do it the best of my ability. I'm gonna be there. I'm gonna do it. And when you understand that and you start, like, it's just gave me such a sense of calm.

Like I left, um, for a month and I was so nervous. I'm like, I'm leaving the podcast. I'm gonna miss two episodes. I'm gonna freak out. And I came back and it was, there was like 40,000 views on the episode, something crazy. And I was like, what the, I think God was just telling me. Just relax, like take, take it easy.

so the imposter [00:12:00] syndrome is, is, is actually harder for comedy because you're with people who are doing this 24 7. But I think all you have to do is like put in the work, focus on the process of, of doing what you need to do, um, and trying your best and being friendly with people. And then everything kind of, you know, lines up as it goes, cuz um, you're always gonna have that.

If you, whatever you start something new, you're always gonna feel that way. And I, I don't think it goes away for at least two, three years maybe, you know,

KT Maschler: I'm anxiously waiting for that day. But on a side note, since I've never really talked to a have you, what, first of all, who's your favorite comedian?

Cause I'm obsessed with standup comedy. Mm-hmm to have you met anybody that you were just like. Aw struck

Scott G: by. Okay. So I'm an expert in not being awestruck, but I will, uh, what's his name got me. That's like my thing, cuz uh, okay. To give you more story spent six years from 20 to 26 in a hedge fund, um, which is ultra high net worth people, billionaires, blah, blah, blah, blah.

From there. Um, I didn't want to do. Financial services. Cause it was too cutthroat and people are scumbags. [00:13:00] So I said, I don't wanna waste my degrees, but let me try to be an accountant in, um, music, cuz I love music and I like hip hop. So I was actually the CFO of title JayZ streaming company. So I was, I worked directly for him and Beyonce.

It was fucking great, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Never got nervous, except for like that first time I met home, but I will tell you how this works. So like in New York, you say you have 20 minutes on set going to, um, you know, Scott, you got 20 minutes at 9:00 PM. Okay. Here I go. If somebody big walks in, you just know like you're not going on tonight, cuz like you've lost all your stage time.

of course who walks in Chris rock? Awesome. Like one of my top guys, you, and we could go through that too. Chris rock, bill Burr, um, you know, old school, Richard Pryor. I love, you know, any type of, I would say I'm more of like the guy who's the, I like the community who were just kind of talking like they're at a bar and just kind of bullshitting, um, not so much of a goofy guy, but.

But whatever. Um, so he was actually really nice. He was like, yo, is it cool if I jump in? It's like, obviously, even if I said, no, you're getting thrown, I'm getting thrown off regardless. [00:14:00] Like, so either way, at least he does, he did the right thing. And that's what I like about comedy. It's like the, to practice everybody practices the same way.

Cuz you it's the only art where you need an audience. Cuz if I do my set by myself, I still don't know. Cause every time you do it, it doesn't matter. And that's like the scary thing about comedy. It's so uncertain. And I think that's the reason why I really like it because. If the person before you bombs.

That could fuck your whole shit up, you know, cuz just because you put 'em in a bad mood, could have said something, inappropriate waitress drop something, you know, like a lot of different things. And I, for me, the journey has been like understanding the way people view me because I never realized like the way P you can never really understand how people view.

But when I was getting up there, it's harder for me get people on my side. And I, I was like talking to people about like, why, why, why don't people love me so much? Like this is people one on one, people love me, but you learn that. I look a certain way. I look a little douchey. I look like a confidence and you know, a kid from blah blah.

So I have to kind of play into that. So when you start playing into that, you know, I look like retard, [00:15:00] Johnny DPP or something funny, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, people start falling into it. So it's all, it's a, a journey of self exploration for me, at least. And obviously connecting with people and being in the moment, all that stuff is great too.

Cause like it's the highest of highs. But the lowest of lowest, like I've had the, my best day in my life has been doing comedy. My worst day in my life has been doing comedy, same, same thing. So it's just the yin and the yang.

KT Maschler: So how do you still get that? Like motivation to keep going back to comedy, even though if you, you may flop like maybe once or twice.

Oh my or maybe a couple times or COVID. How did, did that affect, like your mentality with comedy and switching?

Scott G: Through that coming on stage. Yeah. So I started, I said, when I turned 30, it was February 17th, 2020 COVID started like that week. So for me, I just wanted to get on stage, but you actually couldn't, you like, literally there was, everything was shut down.

So I couldn't get on stage until October 20, 20 and I was prepared. I was ready to go. But almost like that nerves, tho those nerves that you build up, like what if, what if, what if, what if, what if, [00:16:00] like, how bad is this gonna be? Um, it was rough, but what the second on a stage? Like there's two ways to get, to get over your fears.

You can either, like it's called exposure therapies. You can either put like your foot in the, in the pool or you can just jump right in. So I said, I'm just gonna jump right in. I'll start doing it in front of like the biggest shows and you know, whatever, all that stuff. Um, so that was really scary. and then what happens is you start getting good and you start like flowing.

So I won this comedy showcase. I was doing good, whatever. Then all of a sudden, you just have a bomb show and there was nothing really wrong with the set. It was just a Monday night. Don't go to comedy shows on Monday. It's the cheapest nobody's there? No, no good pops. And it was just, the crowd was terrible.

Um, and I still am fucked up by that. Like in my brain. It's like, what, what, what do you do against it? It's like, you could either quit. Well, you just, it's only has the power that you give it. Right? So I, I just say, oh, this is a shitty show. That's part of the process. the way I try to look at failures now is like, where's the learn?

Where's the, the learning in that. And for me, I was. Thinking I'm the shit. Honestly, I just was [00:17:00] getting to, you know, you're used to prepping a certain way and I was going to Miami I'm partying. I'll just go jump in. Do shows like who the fuck am I? I'm not, you know, I can't be doing that. So, uh, you learn your lesson the hard way.

Cuz when, um, like my best show, I won this showcase, uh, at Caroline's, you know, on Broadway, biggest, one of the biggest shops in New York, 400 people. Unbelievable. I popped everybody was fucking going. It was crazy. Did that same set? That's the one I blew it. It's the same exact set bit for bit just, just the way the crowd goes.

Does that kind of relate to podcasting in any way

Scott G: podcasting is harder because you don't get a ton of quick feedback. Like when we do this episode, you'll see, see the, the, the, the views, but it's also, there's so many different things that go into podcasting for me. Cause I thought it's like, I'm more of a content guy.

Just put me on, let me just talk the shit and let me just do my thing and it'll be fine. But you learn the other pieces of this, like technology, like of podcasting. The most important pieces are like doing the promotions, doing the marketing. I didn't know that until a year in like, Now, I don't think a lot of people [00:18:00] realize that like all about posting and sending stuff out and, um, connecting with people was a big thing for me.

Cause I'm not a big social media guy, but when you start reaching out to people and talking to 'em like they get more interested. So like these little things I never really thought would do it, but they're still certainly ups and downs. Like I still get addicted to like we had our biggest month last, last, um, last month was like 250,000 views and I'm like, Shaken so happy and now it it's like March 4th and I'm looking, could I match that?

Could we, how do we get that better? And you get a, you know, I try to stay away from doing that. You have to check it a little bit, but, um, certainly like similar. I think, I think everything in life kind of has its ups and downs. Right.

Yes for sure. I totally relate to that. So you have given so many golden nuggets over the past 20 minutes or so, do you have any kind of last piece of advice you want to share?

Scott G: I would tell people a couple of things. Hmm. You got younger people listen to this. Yeah, I would assume. Right. Okay. So this one's gonna be for, even for older people, stop talking to yourself. So like negatively, like that voice [00:19:00] that you have in your head, like we're talking now. Right. But there's some, Katie's thinking of some shit right now.

Whatever's going through her head, right. That voice in your head. Shut that bitch up. If you could, don't totally shut it up. Try to calm it down because that will be your biggest critic. And that voice could either like manifest your greatness or it could stop you from doing everything like that voice for me, stop me from doing comedy till I was 30.

I could have been doing this for 10 years. I could have been famous by now. Katie could have had a Netflix show, so that voice is literally gonna be your make or break. So don't be so hard on yourself is, is the whole point of that. And, um, I've been getting this question a lot from a lot of emails from people it's like, I don't know what to do with my life.

I don't, you know, people have passions, right? Katie, I'm not a person who like, has had a passion in my life. I haven't been playing the piano. And when I tell people it's like the longer you wait, you're not gonna figure it's not gonna. Pop in your head. You're not gonna figure out what the answer is like, oh, I wanna bake.

You have to do it. So take massive action. That first step is the snowball down the [00:20:00] hill, where you're really able to like take you'll figure out what you want to do. And even if you do something that you don't like, at least you can cross it off the list and say, let me move on. So you have to keep moving.

You have to keep, keep shaking and keep taking little incremental steps towards things you think you want to do, like podcasting for one. And you'll quickly know I like it, or I don't. Two it's in two nuggets for you, Katie. I gave you,

I love it. Well, if people wanted to get more golden nuggets from you or learn more about you, where can they go?

Scott G: Uh, just type in causing the effect podcast. Um, we're top rated. I would say we're like mental health mindset. I try to give, it's basically like a spiritual version of Joe Rogan. That's what I try to do. So I have fitness enthusiasts. I have psychologists it's really geared for everybody. What I'm trying to do is like, just simply wait, raise a person's awareness in any topic that they feel, because I like, um, in today's world, it's hard to really get.

A true, genuine approach without trying to sell something or I, I don't try to sell anything. I, I look like I'm just here to kind of give something that I feel like the world is missing and that's a typing cause in the effect and follow me on Instagram, whatever, all that stuff [00:21:00] got a YouTube channel, I'll find you

KT Maschler: Well thank you so much for your time today

Scott G: thank you, Katie. Love what you're doing.

And that is it for this week's episode. Thank you so much for tuning in it truly does mean the world to me. If you want to show your support for the quest for new inspiration, make sure you check out our merge store and get that bubbly. But blunt, sweatshirt.

If you are interested in the new spring colors for the bubbly blunt sweat shirts and t-shirts. DM me on Instagram at the quest for new inspiration, and I will get a pre-order started for you. Otherwise to show your support. For the quest for new inspiration, make sure you follow us on Facebook. And Instagram at the quest for new inspiration and on Twitter at new inspiration pod. And make sure to leave a five-star review or share it with a friend it truly does make a world of difference for my little podcast

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